Category Archives: General

Truth vs. Happiness

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What would you rather have: more truth or more happiness? I am sure most of you will immediately think this is a false dichotomy and that these two concepts are linked. The more truth you acquire, the more you will be able to make decisions that lead to more happiness, right?

Well, this may be right, but is not necessarily so. I listen to and read a fair amount of atheist shows and articles. This has been one of the most informative ways of pointing out flaws in my thinking and inconsistencies in my beliefs. The biggest thing I have learned from doing this is that atheism is very logical and based on truth at all costs. This I greatly respect. I have seriously considered becoming an atheist in the past for this very reason. Atheists don’t appeal to belief without evidence, tradition, or personal feelings. And nor do I.

However, one thing I have decided recently for myself (and I really knew this all along, but had never really thought upon it), is that I am not interested in atheism even if it had the highest possibility of being true, unless it offers some better hope of eternal life by doing so. This was a shocking realization and one I tried to get rid of initially. However, I now realize that I am definitely more interested in happiness than truth and not ashamed about that. Really, everyone else is as well, even if some don’t want to admit it, because it sounds more noble to be a “truth-seeker.”

Now, having said that, let me quickly add that, for the most part, I believe these two concepts are directly aligned. That is, the more truth you know, the more happiness you will be able to attain. However, the difficulty with truth is that it is very hard if not impossible to know anything with 100% certainty except for our own existence. Furthermore, when I say I am more interested in happiness than truth, I am principally referring to only one area, that of the afterlife. Unless I knew with 100% certainty that there was no afterlife or that nothing I did in this life would affect it, I am going to believe in some religion, philosophy, or metaphysical concept that does offer this possibility. The question is not what is the most logical position, but rather what is the most logical position among the positions that offer hope of an afterlife based on what I do here and now. I am not implying here that atheism is the most logical position, only that even if it was so, I still don’t think I would be interested.

I am sure any atheist reading this will be absolutely disgusted at this point. But I want to challenge that reaction. I am living for total consciousness forever, which I believe will bring ultimate personal fulfillment or happiness. I am sure you are living for ultimate personal fulfillment as well.

If I was in great health and expected to maintain that, I would consider atheism as a potentially logical belief that freed my from possible constraints imposed by religion. However, I am not, and though I will live the healthiest life I can, I don’t ever expect to be in really great health. So, by default, unless the truth of atheism could be shown with 100% certainty, it is not even an option.

Let me expound on this a bit. I have kyphoscoliosis, which is a 3-dimensional spinal deformity. It is not as severe as many others, but it has caused immense pain and feelings of inferiority, and has limited my career choices. Now if I did not have this deformity, it is possible I would be extremely skeptical of anything outside of mainstream medicine. I still am skeptical of anything outside mainstream medicine, but not extremely so. Why? Because even though I believe the best science supports conventional medicine, at this point there is not a whole lot else that it can do for me. For this reason, I am very open and interested in chiropractic care, essential oils, and other alternative modalities that at least offer hope, and may (even if the possibility is slight) turn out to be true. I look at the existence of a divine being and the truth of Christianity in  a similar fashion.

Always seek your greatest happiness. Selfishness is not a vice or a virtue; it is simply an unalterable part of what makes us human beings. What is important in seeking fulfillment is to live your life according to the logical paradigm and belief structure that will best accomplish this.

Romans 8:28 as a Cure for Guilt and Bitterness

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I was searching around last week for a way to make sense of undesirable things in life, and eventually thought of Romans 8:28. I have commented on this verse before, but for completely different reasons. Here is how the verse reads, for those unfamiliar with it:

“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love Elohim, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”

My application of this is as follows. If I am currently (not as in my general lifestyle, but the moment I am in right now) meeting the conditions in this verse, then I can legitimately entertain the empowering thought that every flaw I have inherited or acquired, every sin I have committed, and every bad impression I have made will ultimately work together for my ultimate fulfillment.

I believe loving the Father and being called according to His purpose are two sides of the same coin. My practical interpretation of this verse would interpret this group of people as those that don’t compromise their convictions and those who do what they know to be good. To really generalize this, it would be those who live consciously.

I believe this is the sort of concept that just makes a lot of sense to believe in for anyone. For even if it turned out to be false (say at death you simply ceased to exist forever), it would still greatly empower the life you have now. Extremely fortunately for me, this concept is actually written into the Scriptures in which I currently place a good deal of importance.

So, if you are reading this and happen to be a Christian, I encourage you to fully take advantage of this concept to combat the guilt you may feel over a recent failure you made or bitterness over some flaw you have physically or with your personality. However, you can only access this if you are living consciously and meet the conditions in the passage.

The 3 Definitions for Sin

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In the new testament, I have found three primary definitions for sin that I think are very instructive. These are located in Romans 14:23, James 4:17, and I John 3:4.

  1. Sin is doing something despite having qualms about it (Romans 14:23). The classic Biblical example of this is eating meat offered to idols. Paul made it clear in I Corinthians 8 that intrinsically, doing so is not sin. However, he also made it clear that to do so thinking that it may be wrong is sin. Basically, if you have a conviction on something, you need to keep that conviction. Your convictions can and should change as you learn more and transition from a weak believer to a strong believer, but whatever ones you currently hold should not be compromised.
  2. Sin is not doing what you know you should be doing (James 4:17). The immediate context of this statement is in connection with saying ‘If the Lord will, we shall do such and such” instead of boastfully presuming on the future. However, I believe it can be taken in a broader sense as well. Now, the verse actually says that if you know what is good and don’t do it, then you have sinned. Does this mean that I must do every good action that pops into my mind? I don’t believe so. This would lead to absurdity. I believe a sensible way to understand this is to do what you should be doing right now. In order to do this, you would either need a paradigm in place to determine a prioritized list of things you should be doing, or else be following any hint of what could be the spirit’s prompting. Your choice would reflect whether you believe reason or instinct should be the guiding force in your decisions.
  3. Sin is transgressing the law (I John 3:4). This is where things get controversial. Is John referring to the Torah, the commands of Christ, the instructions in the epistles of Paul, or possibly all three of these? My short answer to this is: I don’t know. However, if you want to know how I currently make sense of this, check out my Scriptural Command Paradigm (also part 2).

Now, I believe most people tend to think of the third definition when they think of sin. They ask, is homosexuality sin? What about gambling? Is it wrong to smoke? And the questions go on and on. What they are basically asking is what does the Bible categorically prohibit? This is a very important, though difficult, question that is worthy of much thought and study.

However, I am here to propose that the first two definitions given above are more fundamental and more important than the specific actions the Bible condemns as sin. One reason for this is that these are not ambiguous like the last definition. You know if you have a qualm about doing something, or if you are not doing what you know you should be doing right now. Even something most Christians think is just obviously sinful, homosexuality, is really dependent on how you interpret Scripture, such as this article and this one show. I have a different understanding of this topic than these authors do, but I am willing to admit that I could be wrong.

This drives sin a lot closer to home. You don’t know what other people’s convictions are usually and neither do you know their priorities, so for the most part judging others is excluded in the first two definitions of sin. The only person you can judge is yourself.

I believe this understanding of sin is very important in witnessing. I know of people who use the 10 commandments to show a person that they are a sinner and in need of forgiveness. While I believe this is done with good intention, I think it is a very poor and inconsistent method of pointing out sin. There are a wide variety of viewpoints on whether the 10 commandments apply to Christians today as well as on how to interpret them.

Evaluation of my Month of Moment Decisiveness

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This past month was a total failure as far as my monthly challenge was concerned. I did fairly well the first week and a half, but it was downhill from there. However, I learned some valuable lessons that I think made the month worthwhile despite the personal debacle. Here are some of the important insights that were gleaned:

  • Make decisiveness a fundamental paradigm. In my experience, any action or thought is usually better than brain fog. Either think constructively or act purposely, but by all means be moving forward and not stalling. I tend to believe that if I am conscious and decisive about my actions and opinions that whatever path I end up taking will turn out to be the best. Spiritually, this correlates with Romans 8:28.
  • Function in totally focused blocks of time. Let’s be real. We are human and cannot always give our full focus to something as we might like. So, expect that your focus and energy will wane and be okay with it. If you are working on an important project, and despite your best effort, you just feel like procrastinating, give yourself a 10-minute break. I believe it is much better to take these breaks even if they happen often, than be semi-focused and not get anything of real importance accomplished. Allow your mind to wander and do anything you like for that block of time. When the 10 minutes is up, you will be able to put yourself back into your project with full focus. On a larger scale, this is really what living in appointed times by faith is all about.
  • Add a third category of actions between minor and major – semi-important. While purchasing an expensive item online or deciding whether to join a Toastmasters club are definitely not major actions in any sense of the word, I also would not categorize them as minor. They represent a commitment of a decent amount of time or money and therefore should be given more thought than, say, deciding whether to practice yoga tonight. However, I think for most of these actions, setting a deadline for when you will make these decisions will enable you to be conscious and decisive but still give some thought to these choices. So, you might give yourself 5 minutes to decide whether to purchase that item online or give yourself till the end of the day to decide whether you will join a Toastmasters club.

One of the problems I faced this past month with respect to decisiveness was my self-image quandary. Now, this is nothing new, but it really came to a head this past month. I had good intentions. I really wanted to figure out how I should handle this.

First off, I wrestled with my purpose statement of living for total health and consciousness forever. Even just thinking about total health depressed me because I don’t believe I will ever in this life have anything close to that. I do believe in the possibility that some treatment (besides surgery) or exercise regime could straighten my back and take away my pain, but I am not expecting this to ever happen. Now this thought process yielded a simple but incredibly liberating conclusion.

I became a monist idealist. This means I now believe that only one type of thing exists in reality and that one thing is consciousness. This might sound weird, but quantum physics gives solid evidence for this concept. This allowed me to look at consciousness as supreme, and health, posture, fitness, and diet, though important, as simply channels to obtain higher consciousness, simply means to an end and not an end in themselves. But I believe I can reach total consciousness without perfect health or appearance.

So, I changed my purpose statement to: living for total consciousness forever. This may seem like a small, esoteric change, but it has made a big difference in my outlook. However, the second thing I realized while in my self-image quandary paralleled the concept that catapulted me out of philosophical depression last summer. That is, I am not going to solve all my self-image problems today, or tomorrow, or next week, or next year, or in ten years! That being the case, the important thing is to do something, to have some paradigm in dealing with my self image that I can follow for this week, or this day, or even just this moment, and believe in this paradigm. Then evaluate it at the appropriate time. I think punctuated oblivion is a paradigm that I can function with for now, but I fully expect it to change.

One very practical aspect of decisiveness is that not as many questions need to be written down during the week. Now, this idea of writing down things during the week to think about during the next philosophical appointed time I believe is an incredible concept. However, it has to be kept in check. Generating too many thoughts or questions to look over can turn what should be a fun and educational experience into a dreaded chore.

So, will I repeat this monthly challenge at some point in the future? Probably not, because I am seeking to make this more of a 24/7 paradigm, so there will not be a need for that. What this past month has shown me is that sometimes my failures can teach me more and cause more growth than my successes, as paradoxical as that sounds.

Jesus or Y’shua

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How important is a name? In one sense, it is very unimportant. Whether you are Bill, Joe, or Chris, does it make much difference? It is really just a label.

However, in another sense, it is the most important thing about a person. Let’s say I have a friend whose name is Tom. He is an electrician, is married, has 3 children, is 6 feet tall, enjoys running, and is 40 years old.

Now, if I were to ask you to tell me who my friend was, what would you say? You could say he is an electrician, and that would be true, but lacking – he is so much more than just that. Even if you were to mention all the descriptions given above, this would still not be all of who he is. There is only one description that can truly capture him – Tom. When we say his name, it represents a million (and more) different aspects of who he is all at once.

How deep can a physical relationship be if you don’t know the other person’s name? My name is Daniel. Now, you could call me Bill or Joe or Sam, and I could get used to you doing so. Communication could occur, recognition could happen, and a lot of knowledge about me could be gained. However, if you never used my true name, there would just be something missing.

So, does it really matter whether we use Jesus or Y’shua in referencing the Messiah? In one sense, I don’t think it matters at all. It definitely matters a lot more to him whether you follow His commandments. However, in my own personal experience, there seems to be something missing, even if it is very small, if I never use my savior’s given name.

There are many people who only use the name Jesus. There are also several people I know who only use the name Y’shua. Both names have been used to change people’s lives. I don’t think either should be discarded. In speech you have to favor one over the other, but not in writing. From now on, I will simply use both when I use the Messiah’s name in a blog post.  Jesus/Y’shua is my savior!

Atheistic Prayer

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Last week I had a chain of thoughts that threatened to upend my believed openness on whether an almighty and eternal being exists, which is the first line in my statement of belief. This is not just a presupposition I have held onto since childhood. In fact, just over a year ago I seriously considered becoming an atheist or at least an agnostic.

I largely credit my strong belief now in an almighty and eternal being to William Lane Craig, whose debates with atheists I providentially discovered last summer. I now believe there is overwhelming philosophical and scientific evidence for believing in such a person. However, I thought that if all of this evidence could be dismantled and strong evidence could be supplied for atheism, I would do the rational thing and accept atheism.

Last week I was thinking about the fulfillment that prayer (which I define principally as thinking to the Father) brings to my life. Then the thought came, so would I even be open to atheism if it ever became the most rational choice? I so wanted to say yes to preserve rationality and reality, but my emotions screamed out no.

This dilemma paralyzed me. I realized I couldn’t just write it down and think over it during the next philosophical appointed time. This is because I think to the Father (pray) when figuring stuff out. I couldn’t or was not willing to challenge this practice. I watched my thoughts become willing to cast off my entire paradigm structure to preserve this one practice.

Fortunately, I started thinking rationally, and looked up online if atheists ever prayed. I found many examples, and realized my fears were unfounded. This is because the almost infantile dependence I found myself exhibiting to this practice of prayer was an overarching desire for connection with something greater or all-encompassing. This is where my source of all purpose resides. I realized that this belief I held was not the Christian understanding of the divine, per se, but rather something beyond myself, be that collective consciousness, the energy of the universe, or a spiritual dimension.

Now, I firmly believe at the present time that collective consciousness, the energy of the universe, and a spiritual dimension all flow from my Christian understanding of the divine. But this belief can be challenged and even overturned without me losing my belief in an ultimate connection.

In saying this I want to take back what I said in a previous post about atheists not believing in an afterlife. While many don’t, it is certainly not illogical to do so. Check out this article by Steve Pavlina, an atheist of sorts, for some intriguing thoughts on life after death.

Logical Assurance

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To me, everything else in life pales in comparison to having assurance with regards to eternal life. This is sometimes the only pursuit I can fall back on when tending toward depression. This can give meaning to everything else in life.

I am going to begin with the assumption that the New Testament Gospels are historical. Not just that they have been accurately preserved, but that they represent literal history. I know this is a huge assumption, and I will give evidence and logic for why I believe this in a future post.

Some things I don’t believe are necessary for me to find true assurance are the belief that the Bible is inspired (however you define that) or the use of the other books of the New Testament. I will use both of these ideas (though I define the first one differently than most) to flesh out and expound upon how assurance fits into our daily lives, but they are not the source upon which my assurance is based. So, here is my logic about finding assurance:

  1. Jesus claimed to be the Son of Elohim (Matthew 26:63-64). If this claim is true, I feel safe in believing the words he speaks.
  2. Jesus predicted that he would be killed and raised to life the third day (Matthew 16:21). If this prediction came true, it would be amazing evidence that his claim to be the son of Elohim was true.
  3. Jesus was resurrected as he predicted (Mark 16:4-6). This provides good confirmation that Jesus’s claim to be the son of Elohim is true. Therefore, I feel confident in trusting what he says.
  4. Jesus said the only way to get to heaven was by following Him (John 14:2-6). This statement can only be true or false. Since I trust what Jesus says, I must only look to him to obtain assurance of eternal life.
  5. Jesus said to make every effort to be saved because many would try and fail (Luke 13:23-24). I didn’t say this; Jesus did. So, I believe it is true. I don’t think obtaining assurance about salvation is necessarily going to be easy.
  6. Jesus said those who follow him will be saved (John 10:9). Based on the last point, I don’t think following Jesus/Y’shua is a simple action you take or just some bad things you avoid, I think it is a lifestyle of following his teachings, which are many.

The question then becomes, what does this lifestyle look like? In a nutshell, it is following the commands of the Christ. There will be much variety of opinion on how best this is done. If you want to know my take on it, please see my statement of belief, or my blog posts on scriptural commands, here and here.

Now what commands to start with? This is where, though I don’t principally base my assurance on them, we can be helped out by looking at the book of Acts, which is the history of the early church after Jesus’s ascension, as well as some of the epistles in the New Testament. All of the commands and instructions in these books are also in the gospels. However, some seem elevated over others, so it makes sense to start with them. Three in particular stand out to me:

  1. Believe in your heart that Elohim raised Jesus from the dead (Romans 10:9-11). This is one of the things I mention in my post about what the word ‘Christian‘ means, which is believing in the bodily resurrection of Jesus. In order for this belief to be as solid as it needs to be, very strong evidence of the historicity of the Gospels is probably needed. I will provide this in an upcoming post.
  2. Confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord (Romans 10:9-10). You need to speak your desire to make Jesus lord of your life. I believe this means that if you know His will you will follow it. Of course, it can be very hard to discern HIs will at times, and this is where paradigms such as living in appointed times by faith (also parts two, three, and four) and following the spirit can help.
  3. Repent and be baptized for the remission of sins (Acts 2:38). I believe repentance, which is a lifestyle of turning away from the lusts of the flesh and turning towards obeying Christ’s commands, begins with baptism, which I believe should be done by immersion. I would do this for the reason stated in the reference, namely the remission of sins. I will cover baptism more thoroughly in a separate post.

What is the difference between salvation assurance and eternal rewards? I will cover this at a later time, but my short answer is that rewards equates to the length of time we have salvation assurance. For example, the thief on the cross I believe had assurance of salvation, but I believe his eternal rewards will be much fewer than Paul’s.

So, do I believe it is possible to know with 100% certainty that you will receive eternal life? Well, I believe it is theoretically possible (I John 5:13), but I am not looking for or expecting to have this. Like anything else we “know” in life, I am not looking for 100% certainty, but rather a certainty that is beyond a reasonable doubt. For example, I believe beyond a reasonable doubt that the earth is spherical. It may not be (just ask the Flat Earth Society), but though I do allow the possibility of being wrong about this, this does not concern me in the slightest. I am trying to find the same level of assurance about salvation. And for me, I have.

I believe that it is likely (though not imperative) that you or I will fail occasionally in living this lifestyle. Not fail at what we don’t know, but fail at what we do know and violate (Romans 14:23 or James 4:17). However, I believe that when I sin, I will be convicted about it and will not be able to really enjoy that failure. I will not be at peace and regain the fullest measure of salvation assurance until I start living consciously again and following what I understand at that time to be the Father’s will.

Do I believe that we lose our salvation every time we sin? No, but I do believe we lose our assurance of it, or at least the fullest measure of that assurance. I don’t use my conviction of sin as an excuse to continue in sin, lest though I have taught others, I myself should be a castaway (I Corinthians 9:27).

Please Don’t Become a Practical Calvinist

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Many of the most well-known speakers and authors in the Christian community are Calvinists. The list includes John MacArthur, Al Mohler, John Piper, R.C. Sproul, and Paul Washer. However, I don’t believe any of these men are practical Calvinists (at least I hope not). To those unsure of exactly what Calvinism is, here is a quick synopsis of the popular acronym TULIP:

  1. Total Depravity. Also called total inability, this means that man is utterly unable to seek the Father or choose salvation in Christ.
  2. Unconditional Election. Because of mankind’s total inability to do anything towards His salvation, the Father must elect certain people to eternal life without any requirements on their part.
  3. Limited Atonement. Also known as particular redemption, this means that Christ only died for those He unconditionally elected to salvation. Providing atonement for any other would be superfluous as there is no possibility of them being saved.
  4. Irresistible Grace. Since there are no conditions for salvation, those to whom the Father gives grace will be saved.
  5. Perseverance of the Saints. Also called the preservation of the saints or eternal security, this means that those who are saved will persevere or be preserved to the end. This is because the Father’s irresistible grace will keep them saved.

In short, a Calvinist believes the number and identity of all people who will be saved is determined by the Father. There is nothing a person can do to be saved, and once saved, there is nothing a person can to do lose their salvation.

As you may have guessed by the title of this post, I am not a Calvinist, though I used to be one. I don’t believe in the first four points (total depravity, unconditional election, limited atonement, and irresistible grace) and am undecided on the last point (perseverance of the saints). However, I have never and will never be a practical Calvinist, that is, a Calvinist who allows these doctrines to affect their actions.

Here is a how a practical Calvinist might witness.

Calvinist talking to “lost” person: “You are utterly unable to do anything to get eternal life. However, Jesus Christ might have died for you. This would be due to the Father unconditionally choosing you. If He chooses you, you must become a Christian even if you don’t want to do so. Don’t worry, He will change your desires to make you desire Him. Also, you will continue serving Christ forever. This is because He will change your desires to make you desire to serve Him.”

One of the biggest focuses throughout the new testament is the doctrine of assurance. How can I know that I am part of the elect? Well, I have to do something or say something or believe something. I have to take an action or live a lifestyle to be assured that I am part of the elect. While what constitutes Biblical assurance is controversial, all Christians except for Universalists would say that a person has to do something to have it, whether that is saying a prayer, believing in your heart, not committing any mortal sins, going to mass every week, or living a lifestyle of holiness.

So, even if salvation is totally a work of the Father, assurance is obtained by man. And without assurance, the possibility that you might be part of the elect is a small hope, as Jesus said few would be on the road to life. For all practical purposes, my assurance of salvation is my salvation. There is a difference. One can have false assurance and not salvation. One can have salvation and not assurance. However, the most important thing here is true assurance, however that is obtained (I will discuss this in a future post).

So, if you want to be a Calvinist, go right ahead. I can find many passages of Scripture that support it. However, please don’t become a practical Calvinist. It is your responsibility to work out your own salvation and find true assurance. And I believe doing so would include following the command of Christ to preach the gospel to every creature.

When I used to be reformed, I would tell people that I believed like a Calvinist and lived like an Armenian. If you feel obligated to believe in Calvinism, please keep a fine distinction between your beliefs and your actions. It is because I was uncomfortable having this dichotomy in my life that I migrated toward a view of salvation focused more on man’s free will that is just as Biblical if not more so.

Dealing with Physical Pain and Irritation

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What should you do when you experience physical pain or irritation? This could be something chronic, like I experience with my back and my hands, or something acute like a headache or sore throat. Here is how I take an integrative approach to dealing with pain.

  1. Do what “needs” to be done if possible. Obviously, one must define what a necessary activity is. For me, I define this as my first round of exercise as well as tasks that are both urgent and important.
  2. While doing what needs to be done, try to breathe and/or drink water and maintain good posture and body motions. In other words, I try to be as healthy as possible without stopping what I am doing.
  3. If necessary, stop and treat symptoms quickly and naturally and then finish what needs to be done. If I just cannot seem to focus because of the pain or irritation, I quickly treat the symptoms without medications. So, for example, if I had sinus pressure, I might make some peppermint tea or do a sinus rinse. If I have irritation in my wrists, I sometimes stop to exercise them with my handball and then put some therapeutic gloves on them. If my back is hurting and cannot be ignored, which happens often, I will lay on a foam roller for 5 to 10 minutes.
  4. If what needs to be done cannot be completed despite quickly treating the symptoms naturally, take some medications. I don’t avoid pharmaceuticals, I just don’t use them as my first line of defense. However, if I have a headache that I have done some quick natural treatments for and I still cannot get through what I need to do, then I will take some tylenol or advil or some other pain reliever so I can complete the agenda for the day.
  5. After completing what needs to be done, treat the symptoms extensively. I look at this as an incredibly pertinent use of time, since I am going into the healthcare profession and want hands-on experience treating symptoms. I use pharmaceuticals when something is really bad or I fear I will not sleep very well. Also, I might think about the next day. So, if my nose was running incessantly and I had class the next day, I would probably take something before I went to bed so it wouldn’t be running the next morning.
  6. Consider meditation or yoga for all-purpose treatment. If I am not sure how to treat something or perhaps cannot think straight enough to try, I default to doing meditation or yoga. For an all-purpose exercise that incorporates stretching, posture, balance, breath, meditation, strength, and flexibility, I know of nothing better than yoga. If I don’t feel the need for yoga, I will try meditating. I find a comfortable position where I can keep my back as straight as possible easily. I then focus all my thought and attention on my breathing. Read this post by Leo Babauta on how to start meditating.

These steps can work fairly well if I am in more of a personal situation. However, what if I am in a group setting, such as sitting in class or at a social event? What then? If I need to be focused (such as when I am in class), I will do what I would want my students to do if I was teaching a class. Pay attention and give eye contact without staring. Show interest but don’t be overexcited. Participate without dominating the classroom discussion. This is what I would do whether I had pain or not. However, doing these things mindfully helps me to focus more on what is being taught rather than on the pain I am experiencing. Instead of focusing on myself, I totally focus on doing to the teacher as I would have done unto me. Even if this means I leave with a sore back, hurting hands, and feel like I really did not get much out of the class, I at least fulfilled the command to love my neighbor as myself.

In social situations, such as at birthday parties or receptions, I would probably really focus on my breath and possibly silently repeat a one-syllable mantra so I can ignore the pain. Also, I would keep a semi-pleasant expression on my face. I would also try to leave early without doing so prematurely.

If you are one of those fortunate people who read this and go – “Huh? Who needs all that?” – then I envy you. However, I feel that most of us deal with something at least on a semi-regular basis and having a paradigm of how to deal with these pains and irritations is most helpful. Truly, paradigms are amazing!

Evaluation of my Month of No Judging

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Each month I make a monthly challenge for myself. This past month’s challenge was to not judge other people. The biggest way this benefited me was in making me more aware of when and how I am judging other people. This includes the jokes I make, the prayers I say, the musings I have, the opinions I express, and the agreements I give.

Do I think the ideal life is one of not judging others? Absolutely not! I feel the ideal life is one where all my judgments of others are righteous (John 7:24). This means a few things:

  1. I have already judged and corrected myself. I usually see in others the faults that I possess. My first priority should be correcting my own life before meddling with others.
  2. I realize everyone else is living for the same thing I am living for. I am living for personal fulfillment. So is everyone else I know. If I acknowledge this, I don’t view someone as bad or irritable, but simply misguided at worst if they disagree with me.
  3. The only reason I judge others is to help them. I will not judge someone mentally or verbally unless I believe by doing so I can help them become a more fulfilled person. I will only tear down in order to build up better. 
  4. I am able to realize a person’s awesomeness despite their beliefs with which I disagree. What this means is that before I judge someone I discover the good qualities they possess and form a positive image of them based on these. Then, my judgment is balanced out by all the favorable impressions I have formed of them already.

This attitude of no judging has also affected my prayer life. I used to pray for what I felt people needed mostly, which is a judgment of them. Though I still do this, I now include much more praying for what I think people would want me to pray for them. This makes me excited to see them so I can find out more of how I should pray for them.

All in all, this adventure with being non-judgmental of others has been productive. Please see this post and this post for more thoughts on judging others.