This month’s challenge is inspired by the book “It’s Not Just Who You Know“ by Tommy Spaulding. I am woefully challenged in the relationship department. I have had genuine connections with family, friends, and significant others over the years, but rarely ever put in the effort to turn these connections into deeper, long-lasting relationships.

Honestly, in the past as much as I may have mentally understood the importance of relationships in my life, I did not viscerally value human connection. Also, relationship-building is never something I have considered myself skilled in accomplishing. This month I want to be proactive in building and maintaining healthy relationships.

Here are the parameters of the challenge:

• Learn and use people’s names. Outside of my immediate family members and niblings, I am horrible at remembering names. The first day of this month, I will create an Anki deck with names of people in my life that I go through at least once per day. I will input insightful information about them into the deck as I encounter it. During interactions with others, however brief, I will attempt to use the person’s name at least once.
• Write a note to one person each day. I will purchase a large amount of personal stationery that I can use to send notes to people. Until I have that, I will send out emails. The content of the note is not super important; I just want to get into the habit of sending encouraging notes to those in my life to tell them I care about them, they are important to me, or I am thinking about them.
• Find low-cost inspirational books. Giving someone a book can be a great relationship-builder. I will spend a few minutes each day reading and researching short books, pick a couple by the end of the month that I find inspiring, and order several dozen copies. Then, I will have a great gift ready to give anyone with whom I would like to establish a deeper relationship connection.

I am hoping this month’s challenge will jumpstart an ongoing habit in me of cultivating relationships whenever I have the opportunity.

Namaste.

Kant is a giant in the field of philosophy. As such, I am devoting an entire post to him. Though an interesting read, he is not for the faint of mind. Below are several excerpts from Immanuel Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason.

“For, as the world has never been, and, no doubt, never will be without a system of metaphysics of one kind or another, it is the highest and weightiest concern of philosophy to render it powerless for harm, by closing up the sources of error.”

I disagree with Kant’s notion that metaphysics can be “scientifically” determined in some way. However, I agree it is extremely unlikely that metaphysics will evaporate with increasing education and social progress. It will change forms, no doubt, but will always find a way to survive. What is important is to be meticulous in keeping my and others’ metaphysics separate from our physics.

“Dogmatism is thus the dogmatic procedure of pure reason without previous criticism of its own powers, and in opposing this procedure, we must not be supposed to lend any countenance to that loquacious shallowness which arrogates to itself the name of popularity, nor yet to skepticism, which makes short work with the whole science of metaphysics.”

One of my “10 commandments” is: Challenge uncritical thinking. This could synonymously be rewritten as Challenge dogmatism. However, as Kant says, this does not entail accepting radical skepticism or subjecting knowledge to the whim of the majority. Finding the path that avoids all these pitfalls is difficult, but must be attempted.

“In the science of transcendental aesthetic accordingly, we shall first isolate sensibility or the sensuous faculty, by separating from it all that is annexed to its perceptions by the conceptions of understanding, so that nothing be left but empirical intuition. In the next place we shall take away from this intuition all that belongs to sensation, so that nothing may remain but pure intuition, and the mere form of phenomena, which is all that the sensibility can afford à priori. From this investigation it will be found that there are two pure forms of sensuous intuition, as principles of knowledge à priori, namely, space and time.”

Unfortunately, I get lost quite frequently reading Kant, mainly because he uses a lot of terms having definitions with which I am unfamiliar. However, I understand and concur with the a priori deduction of space and time. After all, the law of non-contradiction, which, along with the law of identity and the law of excluded middle, form the foundation for logic, presupposes the concepts of ‘time’ and ‘space’ in order for it to be utilized.

“As to the intuitions of other thinking beings, we cannot judge whether they are or are not bound by the same conditions which limit our own intuition, and which for us are universally valid. If we join the limitation of a judgement to the conception of the subject, then the judgement will possess unconditioned validity.”

There are certain ideas, concepts, and principles that are so intuitively true to me, I take them as universal. However, the most I really can say is, that they are universal from my perspective. Obviously, I don’t know whether anything is intuitively true for everyone. To act as if something is, stems from either extreme ignorance or an utter lack of humility.

Namaste.

During all of my challenges, I have to keep reminding myself to find middle path. At the very least, this means that if I miss a day, I need to let it go and focus on starting afresh the next day (instead of trying to make up for it by adding more time the following days). It also might mean I need to restructure my challenge if it proves to be too much. Accomplishing less is always preferable to accomplishing nothing.

Things I learned from this past month:

• Hands-free reading. I love it! I prefer not having to physically hold a book when reading – carpal tunnel and all. Plus, it is better for my back. It’s difficult to read a handheld book ergonomically; if you don’t believe me, try it!
• Accessible highlights. It is very handy being able to browse highlights without having to flip through a book to find them. I don’t generally reread books, mainly because however great a book might be, there are so many other books out there – I can’t justify too much time on any one tome. However, I love skimming through the highlights I made; they encapsulate the most important elements or quotes that I gleaned from the book.
• Eyestrain. I would prefer using some type of paper display technology to cut down on eyestrain and give a more natural reading experience. If I intently read on my laptop for under 20 minutes, I am totally fine, but after that point I start noticing that reading becomes slightly more difficult the longer I stay.
• Interest. Reading philosophy texts can be one of the most exciting or most boring activities depending on the author and subject matter. I could do a book study on Hume’s Inquiry Concerning Human Understanding, and be totally engrossed. Augustine’s City of God, on the other hand, was probably one of the most pedantically boring reads I’ve ever endured.

How I would like to incorporate this challenge into my life going forward:

• Kindle Unlimited membership. I signed up for a 30-day free trial of Kindle Unlimited when I started the challenge. I intend to keep my membership at least until I finish with the philosophy books I elected to read on my challenge. After this period, I will reevaluate and see if I believe the $10/month cost is worth the service, or if I want to switch to borrowing from libraries.
• Screen display settings. I am not interested in buying an E-reader at this time. However, I will research the optimum display settings for extended reading on a laptop. Also, there are several apps I would like to test out, such as f.lux.
• Daily non-fiction reading. I want to incorporate some non-fiction reading (even if just for 5 minutes) into my daily routine. If nothing else, I will place some books on the nightstand next to my bed to read for a few minutes before I turn the lights out for the night.
• Engaging fiction on stand-by. Always having a couple fiction books on hand, both via audio and hard-copy, is a great way to productively use down-time. As I am already a science fiction aficionado, I will definitely start with more of that genre.

If you have read my latest blog posts, then it will go without saying that I will continue to incorporate intensive exercise into my daily routine. In Dialectical Behavior Training (DBT), there is one section of skills focused on distress tolerance. These are used when we are in emotional overload and need a way to reset and regroup. I would like to compile a similar arsenal of skills that I can use when in physical distress, which unfortunately, is fairly often.

“The unexamined life is not worth living.”
– Socrates

Namaste.

The third week of readings involved a lot more heavy lifting (philosophically speaking) than the first 2 weeks. I read some of the most prominent philosophers to this day: Descartes, Locke, and Hume, just to name a few. As a result, the excerpts may be more lengthy and less witty than the ones previously.

“I am, I exist—that is certain. But for how long? Surely for as long as I am thinking. For it could perhaps be the case that, if I were to abandon thinking altogether, then in that moment I would completely cease to be. At this point I am not agreeing to anything except what is necessarily true. Therefore, strictly speaking, I am merely a thinking thing, that is, a mind or spirit, or understanding, or reason—words whose significance I did not realize before. However, I am something real, and I truly exist. But what kind of thing? As I have said, a thing that thinks.”

– Descartes, Meditations on First Philosophy

I don’t subscribe to most of Descartes philosophical system. However, ‘cogito, ergo sum,‘ or ‘I think, therefore I am,’ is probably the only thing I will every assert to be undeniably true. Though somewhat of a tautology, it is a necessary starting point for any philosophical journey.

“If a man abounds in the fruits of the Spirit: charity, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, chastity, against which, as Paul says (Gal. v. 22), there is no law, such an one, whether he be taught by reason only or by the Scripture only, has been in very truth taught by God, and is altogether blessed.”

– Spinoza, Tractatus Theologico-Politicus

I feel quite confident I would get along well with Spinoza. His blend of rationalism with spirituality is refreshing to behold.

“Though the earth, and all inferior creatures, be common to all men, yet every man has a property in his own person: this no body has any right to but himself. The labor of his body, and the work of his hands, we may say, are properly his. Whatsoever then he removes out of the state that nature hath provided, and left it in, he hath mixed his labor with, and joined to it something that is his own, and thereby makes it his property.”

– Locke, Second Treatise of Government

This passage is the foundation of Locke’s views on property rights. I believe Locke’s view that every person owns their own body and the fruits it produces coincides neatly with the concept of bodily integrity. This is the highest value I believe a society should seek to preserve.

“I think it past doubt, that there are no practical principles wherein all men agree, and therefore none innate”

– Locke, Essay Concerning Human Understanding

I’m reminded of a qutote by Einstein: “Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age 18.” Anytime someone appeals to ‘common sense’ I inwardly roll my eyes. It is a conversational dead-end.

“The most perfect philosophy of the natural kind only staves off our ignorance a little longer: as perhaps the most perfect philosophy of the moral or metaphysical kind serves only to discover larger portions of it. Thus the observation of human blindness and weakness is the result of all philosophy, and meets us at every turn, in spite of our endeavors to elude or avoid it.”

– Hume, Inquiry Concerning Human Understanding

Hume is my favorite philosopher to read by a mile. His writing exudes a pleasing mixture of clarity and humility. The more you learn, the less you know. This has certainly been the case for me.

“In all magistracies, the greatness of the power must be compensated by the brevity of the duration. This most legislators have fixed to a year; a longer space would be dangerous, and a shorter would be contrary to the nature of government.”

– Montesquieu, The Spirit of the Laws

This is an interesting rule. In general, I’m against term limits. Greater political turnover doesn’t equal better representation. Also, it prevents good politicians from continuing their service. How long to set the length for various terms of office is a separate question, and this seems as good a metric as any for determining them.

“Teach him to live rather than to avoid death: life is not breath, but action, the use of our senses, our mind, our faculties, every part of ourselves which makes us conscious of our being. Life consists less in length of days than in the keen sense of living.”

– Rousseau, Émile, or On Education

A paraphrase of this would be the mantra I tell myself frequently: ‘Don’t aim to survive; aim to thrive!’ As a person who suffers from chronic pain, it is tempting to just focus on surviving the day until I can go to bed, get up, and start the whole process over again. But this isn’t living. Creating and accomplishing monthly challenges is one way I can put a spark in my days.

Namaste.

Tomorrow, I am starting a new challenge requiring 2 hours of physical conditioning every day. This includes yoga, calisthenics, aerobics, PT exercises, and stretching. Here are the specifications for completing the challenge:

• Divide the day up into 6 segments. Each segment should be the same amount of time. For 16.5 hours, this works out to 2.75 hours per segment, but I can adjust as needed.
• Accomplish at least 15 minutes of physical conditioning per segment. I will aim for 20 minutes, as this will ensure that I complete the 2 hours needed by the end of the day, However, as long as I commit to at least 15 minutes, I can make up the extra time at day’s end. The one exception is if I get a workout in before starting the day. In this case, I can adjust the times proportionately.
• Incorporate daily karma practices into at least 10 minutes of challenge time. Certain forms of exercise are not conducive and even antithetical to multitasking, such as yoga and high-intensity workouts. However, others can be great opportunities for it. Before my bike accident, I would do a jog the first thing every morning during which I completed my daily check-in and mindfulness practices.
• Be creative and proactive with fitting in exercises during the day. I have a whole host of compiled exercises from several different physical therapists for my back over the years. Recently, I now have an arsenal for my drop foot as well. While it may not be appropriate to do a yoga pose or break into calisthenics in some situations, there is probably some exercise I could utilize.

I have high hopes for this challenge! Hopefully, I can find the right amount and frequency from a variety of modalities to keep my mind sharp, my body in shape, and my back from complaining too much.

Namaste.

I find myself to be much more absorptive now when reading. It’s like I have fully switched on the ‘philosopher mode’ in my brain to allow for full processing. Here are excerpts from week 2:

“Who is invincible? He who allows nothing to disturb him which is independent from the will. Examining one circumstance after the next he observes and is not disturbed.”

– Epictetus, Discourses

I find that in setting goals, it is extremely empowering to base them on things we have control over (e.g. to accomplish a project, not please a person). In other words, make them completely dependent on our own will and not that of anyone else’s.

“If faith in sense is not first firmly set, if it does not prevail, there is nothing to which we can appeal in what we claim, by any form of mental reasoning, about the truth of things we cannot see.”

– Lucretius, On the Nature of Things

Lucretius was a materialist. He valued the primacy of the physical senses as the bedrock for all knowledge. Although I am not a materialist, I greatly value his contribution to methodological naturalism, which is now the substrate upon which modern science is grounded.

“But although I appreciated his detailed exposition very much, I still think it is more suitable to stop at individual points, in order to understand what each person concedes or denies; from such admissions, one may make the necessary deductions, and finally arrive at an appropriate conclusion. When the discourse gushes forth like a torrent, many subtle points are washed away. You hold on to nothing, and you grasp nothing; nowhere can you curb the speed of the onrushing rhetoric.”

– Cicero, On Ends

Here is Cicero decrying the usage of the Gish gallop, where a debater tries to overwhelm the opposition by sheer number of arguments, instead of the strength of each individual point within an argument. I wholeheartedly agree with his frustration!

“This is the touchstone of such a spirit; no prize fighter can go with high spirits into the fight if he has never been beaten black and blue; the only contestant who can confidently enter the ring is the man who has seen his own blood, who has felt his teeth rattle beneath his opponent’s fist, who has tripped and felt the full force of his adversary’s charge, who has been knocked down in body but not in spirit, one who, as often as he falls, rises again with greater defiance than ever.”

– Seneca, Letters from a Stoic

This quote is powerful and speaks for itself. Amazing imagery!

 “Remember too on every occasion which leads thee to vexation to apply this principle: not that this is a misfortune, but that to bear it nobly is good fortune.”

– Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

I like to view everything in life as either an opportunity for enjoyment, an opportunity for growth, or both. If I remember to do this, I can find a way to be grateful for whatever happens, and sometimes even excited despite less than favorable circumstances.

“The soldier who has slain a man in obedience to the authority under which he is lawfully commissioned, is not accused of murder by any law of his state; nay, if he has not slain him, it is then he is accused of treason to the state, and of despising the law.”

– Augustine, The City of God

If the government commands you to murder someone and you refuse, is this treason? Maybe. I definitely agree if you are a soldier in an active combat situation, it is necessary for there to be unquestioning obedience to orders, but I’m not sure how far this extends. I’m reminded of the Nuremberg trials.

“Tolerance is to not reveal the faults of others.”

– Huineng, The Platform Sutra of the Sixth Patriarch

Simple. Straightforward. Powerful. Are you tolerant of others? What about politicians? What about media figures? If you value tolerance and use the above definition, this cuts out a lot of everyday gossip, which is probably a good thing both for you and those you are discussing.

Namaste.

The following are quotes from the first seven books I skimmed. I think the quotes mainly speak for themselves, so I will try to limit my contribution to a minimum.

“The Self is everywhere, without a body, without a shape, whole, pure, wise, all knowing, far shining, self-depending, all transcending; in the eternal procession assigning to every period its proper duty.”

– The Upaniṣhads

The Upanishads frequently discuss the relationship of the personal self to the Universal Self. As a panendeist, I found it fascinating to read.

Tomorrow I am going to start a new challenge. Growing up, I was an avid reader. Somewhere along the way, I stopped being one. I’m not sure if it was due to dry textbooks, carpal tunnel syndrome, chronic back pain, or just pure disinterest, but I lost the thrill of reading.

For this month’s challenge, I am going to take a reading dive that to many might seem dull, but which I find captivating: philosophy texts. More specifically, I find the study of philosophy to be fascinating; books may or may not be.

Here are the parameters for the challenge:

1. Sign-up for a 30-day free trial of Kindle Unlimited. All of the books I will be reading from are available for free or under $1 with this subscription. What this means is that I will be reading mostly from a screen, which isn’t optimum for eye health or skimming, but is incredibly cheap and accessible.

2. Each day, select a book from the following list:

• The Upaniṣhads (8th to 1st century BCE)
• Bhagavad-Gītā (5th to 3rd century BCE)
• Confucius, Analects (c. 500 BCE)
• Plato, Last Days of Socrates (399 BCE)
• Plato, Republic (380 BCE)
• Aristotle, Nicomachean Ethics (350 BCE)
• The Daodejing: A short book on Daoist philosophy (c. 300 BCE)
• Epictetus, Discourses (108 CE)
• Lucretius, On the Nature of Things (50 BCE)
• Cicero, On Ends (1st century BCE)
• Seneca, Letters from a Stoic (c. 65 CE)
• Marcus Aurelius, Meditations (161-180 CE)
• Augustine, The City of God (426)
• Huineng, The Platform Sutra of the Sixth Patriarch (8th century CE)
• Descartes, Meditations on First Philosophy (1641)
• Spinoza, Tractatus Theologico-Politicus (1677)
• Locke, Essay Concerning Human Understanding (1690)
• Locke, Second Treatise of Government (1690)
• Hume, Inquiry Concerning Human Understanding (1748)
• Montesquieu, The Spirit of the Laws (1748)
• Rousseau, Émile, or On Education (1762)
• Immanuel Kant, Critique of Pure Reason (1781)
• Friedrich Nietzsche, On the Genealogy of Morality (1887)
• Dostoevsky, Brothers Karamazov (1880)
• William James, The Principles of Psychology (1890)
• Ludwig Wittgenstein, Tractatus Logico-Philosophicus (1921)
• Albert Camus, The Myth of Sisyphus (1942)
• Simone de Beauvoir, The Second Sex (1949)
• Bertrand Russell, The problem of philsophy (1956)
• Thomas Kuhn, The Structure of Scientific Revolutions (1962)

3. Spend at least 1hr/day skimming the book. My goal is not to consume, but to nibble. I am not at all interested in reading for reading’s sake. I want to taste the thoughts from thinkers of ages past and expand the way I view myself. The hour of skimming can be spread out as much as needed during the day.

4. Publish a blog post each week of the challenge. The content will be whatever I have gleaned that week from my readings and musings thereupon. What I write about doesn’t have to be super insightful – just my feelings and thoughts about the books or the excerpts I read from them.

5. Choose 2-3 of the books to put on my purchase list. If I want to read a physical copy of a book, it is more economical for me to borrow it from a library, assuming it is available. However, I do want to develop my own library of books I find especially interesting, meaningful, or that I might want to reread in the future.

6. Restart high-intensity exercise for at least 10 minutes a day. In order for me to glean the most out of my reading this month, my body needs to be in shape. Since my accident, I have become extremely sedentary. This needs to change and this challenge is the motivation I need to do so.

“The mind is just like a muscle – the more you exercise it, the stronger it gets and the more it can expand.”
~ Idowu Koyenikan

Namaste.

“Willfulness must give way to willingness and surrender. Mastery must yield to mystery.”
– Gerald May

Willfulness. It is a state I am currently trying to escape as I type this blog post. I think of willfulness as the opposite of radical acceptance.

Radical acceptance involves embracing every aspect of our current experience – the good, the bad, and the ugly. Once you radically accept a situation, you are free to pursue any course of action. You might try:

• Being content – There are so many times where our frustrations and struggles are unnecessary or ineffective. They are complications we are adding on to our experience. If we can learn to accept ourselves fully, we can cease the struggle and find peace.
• Wise action – When I accept all possible outcomes, that frees me to fully commit to a particular path without fear of disappointment or failure. Since I’ve already accepted these possibilities, if they happen, I can surf through them with grace.
• Skillful change – Radical acceptance does not mean we can’t change; it means we don’t have to do so. If we decide to make a change in our life, we do it with wholesome motives and realistic expectations.

Willfulness is a state of non-acceptance. When I’m in this state, I am unable to do any of the above actions. These actions can ONLY be implemented after acceptance has taken place.
I might appear to be engaged in one of the above strategies, but it is just an act. It is not real. I am living in a delusion.

• Laziness – I might appear to be content and even convince myself that this is what I’m doing. But if I look deeper, I know I am just avoiding. Avoiding what exactly? This is one of the big problems of willfulness. It doesn’t mean avoidance of any particular thing necessarily; it simply means being aversive in general.
• Impulsive action – Sometimes when I am willful I can become very productive. However, there are 2 problems. First, I don’t enjoy my productivity. Second, it won’t last; I will burn out. This is partly due to not enjoying my work and partly due to it being impulsive urge-dominated actions.
• Unskillful rebellion – Willfulness can motivate someone to make extreme changes. Regrettably, the purpose in doing this is not to find greater ease of well-being for ourselves and those around us; it is to live out some addiction or to prove ourselves right. It completely lacks humility and patience.

I have been struggling with willfulness quite a lot lately. Either that, or maybe I am just finally observing myself enough to know when I am being willful. Regardless, it has been the source of a lot of confused suffering on my part.

Here is the latest contingency plan I have developed for dealing with willfulness. I use the acronym ORTHI:

1. Observe the willfulness. Label it. Experience it.
2. Radically accept that at this moment you feel (and may be acting) willful. You cannot fight willfulness with willfulness.
3. Turn your mind toward acceptance and willingness. Remind yourself of the benefits of willingness. Tell yourself you would like to be more accepting.
4. Half-smiling and willing posture. Use these physiological adaptions to help tweak your mental chemistry.
5. If immovable, ask, “What’s the threat?” Why are you resistant to accepting reality as it is? Do you feel that if you did, you would be trapped? Check the facts and challenge assumptions that don’t fit them.

“No amount of human willfulness can overcome God’s determined love.”
– Max Anders

Sometimes if I have completely hit a wall, the only thing I can do is call a family member or friend and tell them what’s up. If they are willing 😉 , I engage them in my decision-making. I am obviously not in a great place to be skillfully using my time and energy, so I outsource the problem.

I choose to believe in the Ocean of Living Love, a phrase I picked up from Handbook to Higher Consciousness by Ken Keyes Jr. However strong my willfulness might be, the ocean is stronger. If I can just find a way to connect with it, I can find freedom.

“Conceit and arrogance are acquired states of mind. Conquer acquired states of mind, and basic sanity can unfold. Passion and willfulness are part of false consciousness; erase false consciousness, and true consciousness will appear.”
– Zicheng Hong

May you find peace and purpose in your journey towards true consciousness.

Namaste.

According to Buddhism, the source of emotional suffering is craving. The word ‘addiction’ could be substituted for craving if that is easier to understand. In navigating life, there is an inevitable amount of pain all of us will experience. This pain can manifest in a plethora of forms:

• The pain of a physical injury – This is something of which I have a very recent and direct experience!  🙁
• The pain of chronic physiological discomfort/dysfunction – This is also something I unfortunately have dealt with for over a decade.
• The pain of separation from a loved one – This is not something I have familiarity with, mainly because until very recently I had shut off my emotions to the point where I didn’t really have anyone in my life that I “loved.” (Not something I would recommend!)
• The pain of being invalidated by someone – This is something I feel quite often; sometimes I blame myself for being a snowflake and to just grow a spine already, even though I know this would only mask the problem.
• The pain of disappointment – This is something I am feeling right this moment as I type this post. I often have higher expectations than my time and energy will allow me to complete. I also feel deeply disappointed when I give lovingkindness to someone and they reciprocate with judgment.
• The pain of confusion – I believe everyone experiences this one, and probably on a fairly regular basis. Life is so often perplexing and confounding to our small minds.

Suffering occurs when we experience one or more painful experiences, and choose to crave that life would be other than it is. In Kristen Neff’s book, Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, she came up with this equation: Suffering = Pain x Resistance. Though obviously a generality, I really like this conceptualization of these terms.

What this equation implies is that suffering can be completely eliminated. This could be accomplished by bringing ‘pain’ down to zero, or by bringing ‘resistance’ down to zero. Of these two solutions, the latter is a very hard but theoretically attainable goal.

One way I have learned to deal with aversive and addictive cravings is through urge surfing. This term is one I first heard referenced in a group therapy session. I used to think that when I had an urge to engage in addictive behavior, or avoid dealing with the world, or immerse myself in negative emotional energies, I had only 2 options.

Option #1: Give in to the urge. Succumb to the addiction. Avoid the situation. Allow self-pity to envelop me. Identify with my sadness.

Option #2: Resist the urge. Do what I feel is “right.” Face the situation. Push away feelings of self-pity. Identify with my courage.

What I learned through the concept of urge surfing, is that there is actually a third option. Option #1 is almost always unskillful and can be destructive. However, sometimes I just can’t seem to muster the energy to choose Option #2. So what exactly is this third option?

Option #3: Observe the urge. Fully allow yourself to experience all the thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations that you are experiencing. Simply observe them without attachment or judgment. Explore why you are feeling a specific emotion or thinking a specific thought. Give yourself some time and space to do this.

Cravings don’t last forever. They have a life-cycle. As you observe the urge, you will notice the intensity of it peak and then gradually decrease. Many urges will dissipate entirely within an 8-minute time period if we allow them to breathe and complete their life-cycle. Some may last as long as 20-min if they are especially strong.

The practice I use when I choose Option #3 is to set a timer for 8 minutes. During this time I give my full attention to the urge. I verbalize out loud what I am feeling and thinking. I notice when my emotions become stronger or weaker. I fully accept myself and anything I am experiencing physically, mentally, and emotionally.

My experience in using this practice has been truly unbelievable. The concept made sense to me intellectually, but it still freaked me out the first time I tried it. After being with the urge for several minutes, it lessened significantly. Sometimes before the 8-minute timer beeped, it had completely evaporated.

What had just minutes before seemed impossible to deal with suddenly turned into a non-issue. Please, please, please try this out for yourself.

It might change your life.

Namaste.