Regret is a natural human emotion that gets triggered once we realize that we goofed up, whether consciously or inadvertently. It serves an important purpose, which is to signal us that we are not on the right path and that something needs to change. In this respect, regret is a great tool for learning from our mistakes and failures.

However, regret should only be momentary. Once we process the feeling of regret and start to change our behavior or lifestyle as a result, regret should be banished, as it no longer serves any useful purpose. It is at this point that regret turns from being an asset to being a liability, and should be avoided at all costs.

Unfortunately, I and I am sure many others tend to let feelings of regret linger.

• I wish I had studied more.
• I should have used my time more productively.
• I’m sorry I lost my temper.
• If only I hadn’t blown away that money…

The present is the only moment we ever inhabit. When we give in to regret, we are refusing to acknowledge reality and missing the joys that can accompany each breath. We will probably later regret that we spent time regretting and on the cycle goes.

So here are a few things that can be done to let the regret go, whether it was caused by something as simple as oversleeping or as serious as losing a marriage or career.

1. Realize that ongoing regret accomplishes nothing. Sometimes I think we believe that by mourning over our failures that will in some way atone for them. Well, it won’t. They are what they are. All regret does is compound the problem.
2. Realize that ongoing regret is counter-productive. We are doing the very thing we regret. When bothered by our past, we are not using our time productively, building good relationships, or developing ourselves. This only perpetuates our failures and our regrets.
3. Focus on the present moment. This almost sounds banal to suggest, but it really works. Regret cannot exist in the present; it only inhabits thoughts of the past and worries of how our past actions will affect the future. Try meditating for five minutes and see what that does to your perspective.
4. Start working. Get busy living your life. Discover what is important to you and pursue it wholeheartedly. Start a job, live out a passion, build a relationship. It is never too late to embark on the journey of personal development.
5. Stop comparing yourself with others. Regret gets its fuel by looking at those we think are better off than us and telling us that we would have been like them if… Stop that! Don’t live to beat someone else in the art of living. Just start painting the picture of your own life and enjoy the process. Forget about the destination.

Hopefully these solutions will help you live the life you have right now to the fullest. Happy traveling.

My personality is such that it would be possible for me to be almost completely mechanistic: to just live for completing the next goal – endlessly. Unlike Leo Babauta, I believe goals are incredibly freeing and fulfilling, even if I greatly value his position. However, I purposefully create sacred spaces in my life where there is not a goal. I look at this as what art is all about, whatever medium it takes. These are times to fully enjoy the sensations of the moment. What are some of the things I do during this time?

• Music – Playing my instruments is a whole new experience for me these days. I don’t do it often (except for at church) and when I do there is nothing I need to accomplish (except for the occasional recital). I can enjoy just hearing myself play, without criticism, without priority – just experience it.
• Meditation – I am a newcomer to this and should carve out more special moments to engage in this practice. I am someone who always has something to think about, so it can sometimes be a challenge to just let all those thoughts go, focus on my breath, and just be in tune with myself.
• Drinking Tea – I often drink tea late at night. Sometimes I try to make those 5-10 minutes a sacred spot and just be aware – aware of my blessings, aware of the world, aware of other people, aware of my dreams – just pure awareness without giving in to the urge to think or do something.
• Walks in the Woods – I love nature even if my allergies don’t always cooperate. Sometimes I go out in the woods somewhere to think, but other times I go out just to go out. No plan, no agenda, just making decisions as I come upon them.

Don’t expect these sacred times to magically appear in your life. It is so easy for me to crowd these out with other responsibilities and studies. But when I allow that (and it is more often than I would like), then I am robbing myself of really living. I become just a robot fulfilling tasks. Art, whether in the form of creating something spontaneously, being aware of your surroundings, or expressing a beautiful statement, needs to be guarded and preserved. Without it, we may still have the most developed brain of any species, but for what?

It may be hard, but don’t give up on art. Don’t give up on those sacred spots in your life. Carve them out of your busy day. Enjoy life – not the goals you have set or the things you have accomplished, but just life itself. It is beautiful.

I like certainty. This is why I think about and study every aspect of life ad nauseam and usually enjoy doing it. I try to use well-defined terms, clear-cut logic, and unbiased research to find elegant solutions to political, social, theological, and medical controversies.

However, sometimes (actually a lot of the time) it is necessary to live with at least temporary uncertainty – with solutions or conclusions that aren’t blatantly illogical but do leave something to be desired. This is where, for me at least, it is crucial that I follow my paradigm of living in appointed times by faith and practice centering on the present moment. All I really ever should ask myself during the week is “What should I be doing right now?” and then once I know the answer (and many times this is something I know instinctively) I should go and do that thing leaving other thoughts behind. If I truly am not sure what to do, I have paradigms for how to deal with that that I should follow.

This is life – and it can be so simple. Oh, I still have my philosophical musings, soul searchings, and other endeavors that make life more fulfilling at designated times, and this is great. It means I am constantly changing in small or big ways in every area of life.

I have heard the expression and may have even quoted it in the past, “Don’t be so open-minded your brains fall out.” I agree and disagree with this statement. I do believe it is necessary to have some baseline paradigm that gives a rudimentary structure to your life, such as the one I have. So, in this case, I would agree that if you are so open-minded that you don’t even have this structure because your are constantly mentally challenging everything, I think this could be disastrous. I have had one period of my life that was like this, and I was in nearly constant depression for most of it.

However, once you have a structure (as basic and as little as possible) to your life, then you can be as open minded as you want, and in my opinion, the more the merrier. Why? Well, for me, it is fulfilling to ask questions and ponder all the mysteries of life and the possible explanations, or social structures, or politics. One of the things that most fulfills me, other than when I enjoy great health, is seeking to know the truth. I believe that the truth does set people free, as Jesus/Y’shua said in John 8:32.

One of the defining characteristics that distinguishes people from other animals is the drive to understand things. This must be kept alive at all costs. The art and science of living is figuring out how to do this while engaging in all the routine tasks of each day.

It is very easy to start living in the past or in the future. The present moment can seem fleeting and unimportant. However, the present is all you have control over. The past is frozen. What’s done has been done. The future is uncertain and vague. Even the control we think we have over it is mostly illusory.

Not being centered for me usually takes one of the following forms:

1. Mulling over how little I am improving in a certain area. Honest and rational evaluations can be tremendously beneficial. However, beating myself down because I don’t see that much change in myself is not good and is focused on the past not the present.
2. Worried my back will worsen and I won’t be able to work. This one pops up all the time for me. Whatever happens in the future will happen in the future. The best I can do is just focus on being the most healthy I can now and enjoying my current abilities.
3. Deliberating over questions that should be worked out later. Not everything can be figured out or decided right now. I should simply make the decisions or do the thinking I need for this day and not sweat the rest.
4. Worried I will make a B in one of my classes. I tend to view an A as a passing grade and a B as a failing grade, and this is okay as far as it goes. However, I need to focus on putting the effort I feel I should be putting into studying and not put my self worth on the line if I get I get a B or fail. I can’t necessarily control my grades, but I can control what I do with my time.
5. Overwhelmed by all the things I need to get done today. Just focus on doing the most important thing right now and don’t stress about the rest. Stressing about it does not help. If anything, it hurts because my mind is distracted and I cannot put all my energies into whatever task I end up pursuing, which means it takes longer than it normally would.
6. Depressed by the lack of important things I have accomplished in life. Any time you base your self worth on the past, chances are you will be disappointed. This is because the only way you can measure the things you have accomlished is by comparing them against someone else’s accomplishments, and there will always be someone who has accomplished more. Adopting this attitude also makes you angry or envious at the successes of others, because the more they succeed, the less self worth you have.
7. Reliving recent failures or awkward situations. Right after I didn’t do so hot on a test, or said something inappropriate, or otherwise “failed” in some aspect, I tend to relive the experience and not be able to move on. It consumes my thoughts. “Why did I do that? I should have done this. I’m so clumsy and stupid.” This accomplishes nothing except to erode my self-confidence and poison my psychology. If something didn’t go so well, just jot it down and later, when you are more rationally inclined, possibly think what you should do differently to avoid it happening in the future.

This concept of centering is pivotal to lowering stress, attaining happiness, and pursuing higher consciousness. There are several aids that can help you maintain the practice of centering. Meditation is perhaps the most important. I don’t do a lot of meditating, but I do try to block out a few times during the week to do this. Don’t worry so much about the pose you adopt when doing this. Yes, the lotus position is probably the most ideal, but there a lot of people that cannot even do this (like me) or at least not comfortably and safely. You can meditate sitting on a chair, lying on your back, cross-legged, or any number of other different positions.

The practice of centering is worth learning because it will directly or indirectly influence every aspect of your life. So, after reading this, channel all the energy you have into the next activity on your list and try to have fun while doing it. Life is too short to miss out on the present moment.

As a quick example from today, I changed the answer I originally put down on a quiz causing me to get it wrong, grabbed my laptop power cords without the laptop, and forgot to bring my physics lab to finish all within 10 minutes. Now these are all minor things, but often times it is the minor stuff that gets us. I had been working on this post, so in the car instead of getting the mulligrubs, I centered, put those events behind me, and started just focusing on meditating and praying. It wasn’t instantaneous, but soon I was feeling much more at peace and excited about life.

Try to look at the curveballs life throws at you not as horrible things but rather as opportunities to practice centering. This makes everything that happens worthwhile.

Both science and art are popular words to describe a method of doing something as well as the end result. In the interest of clarity, I would like to give my definitions of both of these words, which I think will be useful when using them in conversation or writing.

Something can be said to be a science if it has an organized, structured plan to get from point A to point B. There is little guesswork or vagueness in science. Everything is well-defined and follows a predictable methodology.

Something can be said to be an art if there is no organized, structured plan and no definite point B. It is something that cannot be codified into a methodological framework and is intensely personal and subjective in nature.

Using these definitions, we see that something is an art or a science based upon how it is done, not upon what subject it is. For example, when I was in college for music performance, I approached my music practices and performances mostly as a science and not an art. In fact, my music was probably as much as 95% science. I could tell you exactly how to do anything, from the mechanics of different articulations to the intonation of pitches to memorizing and performing pieces, in a very systematic step-by-step process.

However, there was still something – that 5% – for which I can give no explanation and will not even attempt to do so. This part of my music making was and still is an art. It is something that I either cannot or will not try to break down into discrete parts.

After thinking about these two words in this light, I realize that I have always been a scientist through and through by disposition. In fact, I performed much better when I allowed my science side to predominately rule how I did things instead of my art side.

I believe that most of us probably fall heavily to one side or the other of this spectrum. This is fine; play up your strengths. However, if you find yourself to be a scientist, include some randomness in your life. Dedicate some time to just freely express yourself. On the other hand, if you are an artist, don’t stifle your creativity, but try to establish some guidelines or routines in which your art can flourish.

Science vs Art. This is usually the heart of most miscommunication and conflict (see my post on Reason vs. Instinct). It doesn’t have to be. You simply have to value both of these wonderful tools and perspectives. If viewed properly, they can complement each other perfectly. However, it takes some real work to integrate these seemingly incompatible twins.

I am trying out what already is looking like a promising experiment. In several areas of my life, I have tried using long-distance motivational techniques that seem to work. Right now, these include subconscious reinforcement, detailed plans for failure, and food or monetary penalties. In the grand scheme of things, however, everything comes down to how much I live consciously. This means I respond to stimuli from a rational framework, guard against distractions, and live fully in each moment. So I have created what I believe will become the linchpin of my whole paradigm structure.

What I am implementing is a brief consciousness evaluation at the end of each day and then a general one for the entire week at the beginning of my philosophical appointed times. During these times, I will rate myself from a 0-10 scale, with 0 being no lapses in living consciously and 10 being an absolute failure. For the daily evaluations I multiply that number by 10 and put aside that many cents in a specified envelope. For the weekly evaluations, I figure out the number and put that many dollars into the same envelope. Once the envelope reaches $50, I will donate it to someone who has been influential on my journey to living consciously.

Obviously this scale will be somewhat subjective and always subject to change, but just to give you an idea, I have included my daily version here. 0 is not included but would basically be a really good day.

1. Three or more “distractions”.
2. One definite lapse.
3. Two or three definite lapses.
4. More than three lapses or one substantial lapse.
5. Two substantial lapses.
6. Three substantial lapses.
7. More than three substantial lapses, but still generally maintained focuses, big priorities, and vows.
8. Did not maintain focuses and big priorities.
9. Did not maintain vows.
10. Day in complete disarray.

I look at this as one way I can literally redeem, or buy up the time (Ephesians 5:16, Colossians 4:5). Each time I give into distraction it will cost me in a very direct way. I believe in time this might also act as a subconscious reinforcement as well, meaning that even though I don’t actually think about the penalty, my subconscious still registers it and I live more consciously as a result.

Two of my Scriptural focuses the past year have been redeeming the time and taking captive every thought. Both of these are crucial components to living consciously. I am moving on to a different focus now, but hopefully by following the technique above I will be able to safeguard what I learned through experience the past year.

If you were given the choice to become a robot, would you take it? I am sure your instinctive reaction is a resounding “Of course not!” However, there are many benefits of being a robot. Here are ten reasons why being a robot would be beneficial:

1. No stress. According to medicinenet.com, stress is caused by a physical or emotional change, or a change in your environment that requires you to adjust or respond. A robot experiences no stress because it just follows a pre-planned script that encompasses any situation in which it is placed.
2. No depression. A robot never has time to be depressed since all of its energy is poured into whatever task it is currently performing. It is totally consumed by the now.
3. No guilt. Guilt or regret happens when we do something that we later regret. Robot’s don’t experience this since all of their actions are programmed by someone else. If anything, the robot might get angry at its programmer. However, even this won’t happen unless the robot was programmed to do this, which would be unlikely.
4. Deliberation is calculated and rational. A robot will only deliberate when it faces a decision about which it has not been programmed to respond. In this case, it would quickly deliberate to find the action that would be closest aligned to what it was programmed to do and function in that way until specifically programmed differently according to the situation.
5. Respond rather than react to stimuli. A robot is not “surprised” by anything that happens to it. It doesn’t react rashly or emotionally to unanticipated situations. Instead, it calmly responds in the rational way in which it has been programmed to respond.
6. Little ambiguity about purpose. A robot’s purpose is always crystal clear: to complete what it has been programmed to accomplish. It doesn’t have to wrestle with whether an activity is worthwhile or beneficial. It simply executes the next action on its hard drive.
7. Ability to view pain simply as neurons firing in the brain rather than as an energy-sapping demon. A robot would sense pain as a signal that something is wrong and respond accordingly. It would not languish and consider suicide to end the pain. In doing so, it would be able to most effectively alleviate the pain.
8. Not worried about what others think. A robot has no regard for the feelings or wishes of anyone else. It will perform any action it is programmed for without thought of anything else. It will never let social constraints hold it back.
9. Not afraid of failure. There is no reticence on the part of a robot in doing what it has been programmed to do. It only functions in the present moment and simply functions according to the instructions given to it.
10. Not despondent about messing up. If a robot does mess up in performing a task, there is no shame or embarrassment at having done so. Instead, it simply changes what it needs to so it can accomplish its mission.

Perhaps after reading this, you are warming up to the idea that being a robot isn’t all that bad. Actually, I am sure you are not doing anything of the sort. Why? I can answer that in one word: freedom. Embedded in our psyche is a drive for complete autonomy. Sometimes we choose to settle with something less than that, but that is always in the back of our minds. The problem is, freedom usually brings along with it all the negative things listed above, such as stress, depression, and fear. So, is there any way we can maximize our freedom while minimizing these negative by-products? I believe there is.

Many attempt to solve this dilemma by following some religion. However, I believe making any religious presuppositions the fundamental framework for your life is a very limiting option, unless someone could prove conclusively that the tenets of the religion were true using logic and evidence. My solution is actually much simpler and more liberating than religion. In fact, any person regardless of their religious affiliation could use the method I do without compromising any of their beliefs, at least initially. The method I am referring to I have outlined in previous posts as Living in Appointed Times by Faith. The main reason I wrote this post was to dispel the myth that being a robot was bad, because this would be the main objection to this paradigm, which you can read about by following the link above, as well as part 2, part 3, and part 4. Being a robot is only bad if one or both of the aspects below is true:

1. Someone else is programming you. This is often what happens with religion. A person gives up their reasoning and moral compass to follow a holy book or an expert that they believe without good evidence has the important answers to life’s great questions.
2. The program you are following can never change. The capacity for change is what freedom is all about. No one (I think) will choose to follow one set of parameters for ever. This would result in eternal boredom.

In my ideal paradigm, I follow a preset program of how to behave, think, and respond during scientific appointed times. Then, during philosophical appointed times, I reprogram my robot (or avatar) based on many factors that were processed during the previous week. This cycle can repeat endlessly, producing maximum efficiency, maximum freedom, and maximum enlightenment.

Now, to be honest, I am a horrible robot. I am very moody and am constantly evaluating everything. I get despondent about life very easily, but I also have times of ecstasy after having a breakthrough in some area. This is why this paradigm is perfect for me. It helps me to stay grounded and to realize that change happens gradually. I realize that not even the best paradigm can necessarily work for everyone. I would love to hear your critiques of this paradigm as well as its merits if you have tried it out. I really hope all of my readers are able to live life to the fullest and attain the highest possible level of happiness.

One final note: I don’t want it to sound like I am disparaging religion. I myself currently follow a religion, albeit my own unique version of it. What I do object to is making any religion the starting point in a person’s epistemology. This could be a road to disaster. Everything has to come down to logic and evidence in the search for truth.